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The Story that I am about to tell is me being real for the sake of transparency and hope that others will know that they are not alone in this world.  Society has manipulated human standards and it is good to bring this to light.

In 1998, I took my first Photoshop class in High School.  It was pretty amazing watching the kid next to me make from scratch a cartoon image of him on stage with his band.  My only job was to create from scratch something that represented my life.  So I thought, that would be really easy.  I will draw a soccer ball and put it on stage and get an A for everything that he created.

A year later in 1999, my senior year in High school I started to really fall in love with manipulating images in Photoshop.  I started to get really creative and come up with some fun ways to change photos.  Like putting my head on the guy next to the president and pretending that I was really in the photo.  This started to become a lot of fun, but didn’t stop with the goofy images, it began to turn into creating the perfect girl that was flawless.  A girl who had everything the world had to offer, flawless skin, beautiful eyes, an amazing perfect smile with amazing teeth, and even a fit body.

My reality of what a standard woman would be based on, was an unrealistic perfection that I created in my mind.  A fantasy that did not exist and was based solely on feeding a lustful desire.  This idea of a perfect woman was now what I would seek in a girl.  If she wasn’t perfect then I couldn’t be bothered.

Over the years this became one of the top qualities that I was looking for when seeking out a wife.  This perfect woman that was flawless 24/7, who never had a zit in her life and never had to use makeup because she was naturally beautiful.  I wasn’t going to settle for anything less than that.  But the older I got, the more God started to reveal to me true importance.  The fact was, there was no such thing as a flawless girl.  I had created them flawless in Photoshop and gave girls the ability to have a glorified body.  What I was doing was manipulating reality and trying to live in a Photoshop world.

The older I get, the more I watch my body change.  My hair becomes thinner and I start to see my skin wrinkle and that is the reality of life.  Now, it is really easy for me to change my appearance on a photo, but that is not the world that we live in.  We live in a raw world where people are flawed and imperfect. No matter who you are, you will never live up to the standard of a Photoshopped world.

This scripture has hit home with me in so many different ways and has changed my perspective on how I see woman.

“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”  Proverbs 31:30

The older I get the more I realize how much our bodies change.  I hate to say this but our bodies are fading and we can’t hold on to our youth for the rest of our lives.  We have to look to more important things like character and godliness.  To me, there is something extremely attractive about a woman who is so in love with Jesus that she shines to the world with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  A persons outward appearance fades, but who they are in Christ gets stronger and the inward beauty overtakes center stage, making them extremely attractive to those of the same spirit.

In today’s Photoshop world we have created an unrealistic perfection that has caused our expectations of humanity to be unreachable, leaving too much disappointment.  When we chase after a fantasy we will always be left looking for more.  But when we seek after something attainable like godly character we will never be disappointed.  Life is real, we are flawed but true beauty is found in Christ.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
 Psalm 139:14