The more I read about what true love is, the more I realize how wrong we all are.  Our love usually consists of trying to get something out of somebody for some self gratification.  Our motives are triggered by us being happy and feeling good about ourselves.  But that isn’t what the Bible calls true love.  That is selfishness!  Real love is not self-seeking.

If we are to love somebody the way Christ loves us, we have to be willing to set aside all of our wants, feelings, emotions, and anything that may hinder us from doing what is best for that person.  This is extremely hard because our very nature never wants to be uncomfortable.  We always want to cater to our self and do what is best for us.   So real love requires us to do hard things, to put other people’s best interests first in every situation.

This could even mean you are totally walking away from a relationship so that you can get out of the way of them and Jesus.  It could also mean you stop doing things that will make another person stumble into sin.  It could mean you are speaking the truth in love when you don’t want to stir up the waters.  It could mean giving up your food so somebody else could eat.  Or even giving your time to someone that just needs a friend.  True love requires a sacrifice!

Now this can look different in many various situations, but the bottom line is that if we can’t deny our selfishness and do hard things, we can’t fully love somebody selflessly.  That comes down to what you think is love, really isn’t love at all.  If love has any self-gain, then it is not entirely pure and is just an imitator and the real thing.

Now, I know that this can seem impossible to love people with a pure heart and do it entirely selflessly.  We all will struggle with this, but the more we build our relationship with Jesus Christ and are filled with the Holy Spirit, the more God changes our heart to love like Him.  God’s love is the only love that is selfless, and we can only love like that when we are plugged into Him.  So I want to encourage you if you want to really love… Stay connected to Jesus and watch Him transform your life.  Then you will see what true love looks like.  Pure, unconditional love!