Marriage is not a means to an end. I have had the privilege to live enough life to see many different marriages. Some that have lasted and some that weren’t so fortunate. But the ones that I am really impressed with are the people who understand that marriage isn’t the start of a happily ever after fairytale. It is the beginning of new life but that doesn’t mean that everything will always be butterflies and a white picket fences. In fact, times will get hard and you will come to a point of wanting to throw in the towel and give up on your life long commitment. But when you see marriage outside the confines of selfish gain, God is glorified and blesses you more than you can imagine.

I have been challenged as a single guy to really look at marriage before jumping into that life long commitment. For me, divorce will not be an option. And can’t be with God as the center of my life. What God has connected no man shall separate. But that is where I think many people fail.

When you are single, you really want to be married, to live that life with somebody to hold and pour out your love to. Somebody that you can have experiences with. But what I have seen countless times is that people can make that love interest a god. They are the first thing we think about in the morning, and throughout the day they can be the center of our attention pulling us from a life of responsibility. Days become longer at work/school and we just want to get through everything else to spend that quality time with them. There is nothing wrong with being excited about somebody and wanting to pour out your love but if they are your everything, then you have made them an idol.  And God knows when we have idols in our life He is pushed aside.

This doesn’t change in marriage, and if fact it only gets harder. But what I want to suggest is that we have to put God first. The enemy is going to do whatever he can to try and busy you with life and focus on anything BUT God. It’s extremely easy to fall into that. If we want a blessed marriage full of the love of God, then we have to be connected to the love giving source

For me, I can only imagine a happy marriage if my wife puts God before me. A woman that is totally in love with Jesus because only then, will she really be able to love me the way Christ loves me. UNCONDITIONALLY! I picture marriage not as an ends to a selfish fulfillment of a woman trying to please me and give me all that I want, but a woman who has the same vision to reach the lost and love people to Christ. A woman who has the heart of Jesus and realizes that marriage isn’t an excuse to hide together in a shell away from God’s calling but somebody who is willing to team up and change the world for Christ.  A kingdom minded woman 🙂

If you are going to base your relationship over two people just trying to please each other, it will fail because people fail. But when you put God first in all that you do, love will permeate your connection allowing it to last a lifetime.

I hope you are challenged by this like I am and if you are, look at your relationship and see how much God is involved. If he is your everything I can guarantee you will have a joy that will surpass any circumstance you may face, but if you spend very little time with Him and don’t allow him into your life, how can He work?

*If you are divorced please know that there is grace and God is a loving and forgiving God so keep seeking after Him and he will continue to heal you and love you unconditionally. 🙂

I love you all and Hope that you find the Joy of the Lord because there is nothing in this world that is better.